we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
