I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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