Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
