HIV tests are more positive than that guy
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
