I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
