The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize
