I like to think it a success when the cops are called
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
