I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
