i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
wow bdsm is so cute
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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