im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
