The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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