Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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