So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
