like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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