garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
i've created a new STD.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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