5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
