she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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