I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
