Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
