i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
