I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
