Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
