Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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