do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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