STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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