id be glad to
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
