you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
