I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
