I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
