I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
