Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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