I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
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