i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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