hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
