But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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