We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
