I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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