shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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