Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize