what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
