I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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