I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
