butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
