He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
