You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
