I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
