She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I just googled if crying burns calories
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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