even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
should my penis look like a turkey
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Randomize
