Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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