I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
